Let’s discuss why people hurt both themselves and other people. God’s intervention can heal these wounds.

A young man at the Tabor Retreat Center in Mumbai had a puss development in his leg as a result of a thorn piercing his flesh. Even after using various ointments and attempting home treatments, the pain and swelling persisted and got worse. When he eventually went to the hospital, the doctor advised him to have a small surgery. The wound didn’t heal even after the procedure; instead, it grew larger and worsened, making it more difficult for him to move around on a regular basis.

In the end, someone suggested he go to the retreat center. It was a four-day retreat, and on the second day, after hearing the discussion on Unforgiveness, he recalled that he hadn’t forgiven his father. Residing in the same house, he despised his father and for several months did not communicate with him. He listed all the errors he committed, felt remorse, went for confession, and chose to seek forgiveness from his father. On the third day of the retreat during inner healing adoration, he wept bitterly and released all the inner pain he carried; in front of the Blessed Sacrament, prayed, and forgave his father. That night, after several months, he slept soundly, and in the morning, he was surprised to find his wound had dried, and by the end of the retreat, he was fully healed. He testified his experience and healing. Forgiveness is an important aspect to consider, as it blocks all blessings and healing.

Sirach 28:2-3 Forgive your neighbour the wrong he has done, and then your sins will be pardoned when you pray. Does anyone harbor anger against another, and expect healing from the Lord?

Healing is hard to achieve when we hold onto unforgiveness in our hearts. Our body will reject all medications because of unforgiveness.

 A girl from an affluent family attended a retreat at the center. Upon finishing the retreat, she approached me and asked for my prayers since her parents were searching for a suitable boy. Consequently, she could not make a decision. After about two weeks, she contacts me and says there’s a boy’s profile, but she’s uncertain if it’s God’s will. I told her that she should choose her life partner and that she should pray, and God would show her the right path. She told me her parents had met the boy and approved; when she met him, she had numerous questions for him and learned that he drank occasionally. I advised her to bring him to the retreat center post-marriage, where he can undergo transformation.

She felt that an occasional drinker could turn into a regular drinker, thus she was still unsure of getting married. Every time she had a proposal meeting, a large questionnaire was in her hand. She called me once again to let me know that she had met another boy. Everything was fine, but she wanted to turn down the proposal since he occasionally smokes. She was looking for an excuse for every proposal. There wasn’t a person individual on the planet, I told her. I asked if there was something that was disturbing her which required healing and ultimately it would lead her to accept a good proposal. 

She attended another inner healing retreat and I inquired what was disturbing her. She shared details about her family background; her parents, who worked as government servants, were constantly busy with their jobs. Upon their return home, they engaged in daily fights and arguments, a situation she has witnessed since childhood. This ongoing conflict has deprived her of restful sleep, leaving her feeling fearful. Interestingly, all her uncles and extended families have gone through divorces and separations, contributing to the prevalent family issues. The family lacks peace, and having grown up amidst this broken family, she too feels shattered.

Her relationship with her father served as the basis for the questionnaire she had prepared. She didn’t want her future husband to be like her dad. Because of this inner wound she terrified to get married. 

The Lord spoke to her at the retreat with a strong conviction in her heart: circumstances do not determine a person’s future, even if they are not conducive to growth. However, if God so chooses, He can protect anyone who is tainted by the circumstances. She became aware that she needed to put her faith in the Lord’s providence.

Many of us feel anxious because of past negative experiences, leading us to predict the future based on them. Since no one’s existence is guaranteed, we should look ahead and place our faith in the Lord. Ultimately she married and is now experiencing a fulfilling life. We should take leaps of faith. If our past experiences control us, we won’t be able to progress in our lives. God has granted us life, and it’s not the end. After this life comes our true existence. Let’s not dwell too much on this life. Instead, let us strive to live a holy, perfect, and obedient life while here on earth.

A former seminarian who was once part of our group but later decided to leave the seminary displayed disobedience towards our superior. He frequently challenged the authority of our superior, and when given tasks, he would deliberately do the opposite. He also criticized our superior openly. We were all shocked by his behavior towards our superior, who was known for being a kind person. It was only after he departed from the seminary that we learned the root cause of his actions – he carried a deep emotional wound known as a ‘father wound’. His father, who had a military background, was strict, threatening, and enforced strict discipline within the family. This led the young man towards resentment towards his father. The father was in control of the family and would resort to physical punishment, when he was angry. As a result, if there were guidelines and protocols to adhere to, this young man would recall his father and therefore would not be able to remain at the seminary. He consistently broke the rules at the seminary.

Another individual I was in touch with was frequently unemployed. When I inquired about the reason, he often complained about his bosses at various workplaces. In response, I pointed out that the issue lies within him, and he needed to reflect on himself. He also suffered from a ‘father wound’ issue. Many people with familial wounds tend to hate themselves and also exhibit disdain for those in authority. We ought to approach God and seek His healing.

A girl suffered from a serious stomach issue, and because of intense pain, she would lose consciousness. She went to the hospital for an examination and underwent all tests, with the doctor informing her that all results were normal and there was nothing wrong in her reports. The girl and her parents found it hard to believe the reports as normal because she was experiencing intense pain.

She attended a retreat and during that time, she discovered the cause of the pain. Throughout her upbringing, she suffered abuse from a man who was also a family member. It was a surprise to her, and she couldn’t come to terms with it. This caused her to hate the man, and she kept the incident to herself. As time passed, this incident continuously haunted her, and whenever she recalled that man and spotted him on the streets, she would feel a surge of pain. Her body would generate a pain to divert her mind from thinking about that man. The body, in a way, was aiding her in forgetting that event and creating a different pain in the body. It was a psychological issue. While at the retreat, she forgave the man and prayed about the incident, experiencing it again with God and tears, leading to her complete healing.

Through His wounds we are healed. 

Another attendee at the retreat dealt with intense back pain; she sought medical advice to understand the cause of her discomfort but found little success. As we prayed for her, God revealed to us that He had already forgiven her, so why not forgive yourself? She wept and disclosed that years ago she had sinned by having an abortion. She keeps confession the same wrongdoing repeatedly. The confessor informed her that God had pardoned her, yet she found it hard to believe. In that instant of self-forgiveness, she experienced internal freedom, sensed a sacredness, and abruptly, the pain disappeared.

I’m confident that everyone tuning into this live stream doesn’t intend to sin deliberately; we commit sins due to our weaknesses and situations, and God comprehends this better than anyone. If God fails to comprehend us, who will? He understands, He is prepared to pardon us and has already pardoned us. Let us seek forgiveness and vow to the Lord that we will avoid sin in the future, allowing us to feel His peace, joy, and happiness through the Holy Spirit. Let us avoid remaining in guilt, hating ourselves, and recalling the sins of our past. The Lord invites everyone with heavy burdens approach Him, and He will provide us rest. Let us place our burdens on Jesus; He will bear them for us, and we will find relief. He claims His yoke is not burdensome but easy. As Christians, we ought to be liberated from all our bondages and burdens.

Numerous individuals express their frustrations to me, stating that they’ve admitted their wrongdoings repeatedly, yet past thoughts continue to linger in their minds and cause disturbance. These sins persist because we haven’t forgiven ourselves. Let us remind ourselves: we are forgiven, Jesus has cleansed all our transgressions and pardoned us unconditionally. There is no sin that can’t be washed away by the precious blood of Jesus; even the sins of the entire world can be redeemed.

Each lack of forgiveness, every hurt feeling, every abuse; let us repent and surrender to the Lord, He will embrace us as His children. Even the worst criminal in the eyes of God is not an outcast. When we hate ourselves and don’t seek forgiveness that is when His heart will be grieved. The Holy Spirit within us will be grieved. Let’s apologize and seek the Lord’s forgiveness and return to Him. Let us lead a new and holy life, I now feel forgiven, accepted, and precious n the eyes of the Lord. 

Let us continue to remind ourselves; we are precious, we are pardoned, Jesus resides within us. The most powerful message of the Resurrection is to not fear. Let us simply follow Jesus, embrace holiness, and receive Him as our Lord.

Transcribed by Durriya Alphonso